Thoughts of today!!!
Hello... Now I am home watching Meteor Garden... haha... it is quite a nice show... It was so popular last time yet I never watched it... But seriously I prefer the cartoon which is actually the first Japanese anime I ever watched... Haha... Did not do much at home... continued with my essay... pretty satisfied so far... do one step at a time to reach towards my goal... Though I dun really know wat my goal is specifically... i dun find myself hardworking... just doing something that I ought to do... I am not doing extra or anything... I find my mother more hard working... although her job is tough but she said she will not give up... My mother is so determined and persevering and I really respect her although she said she feel very stupid... Sometimes I feel our characters are so similar... i am happy I did not get my dads character cause although he is smart and alert, but he always not determined and always never get things done... Learning from my mother's spirit I must tell myself to work hard ... Do well in my job and earn enough money to let her enjoy life fuller... Bring her to places that she never go to before but always wanted to go... haha... i love her alot... She is such a strong character... although few ppl appreciate wat she has done, I do... I told her today after church i will go and pick her up from work... Then she was very touched... So I WILL NOT GIVE UP!!! Me and my mother are both born in the year of the cows... meaning we will have to slog but I not scared... live for the day and as long as you like wat you are doing there is nothing worth regretting...

When i was young my dream was to go to Africa or some third world country and help those poor ppl there... i really really like Mother Theresa cause she was so selfless and noble.... although I really like Singapore but I dunno whether I will stay back... as I grew older my ambition changed to be a librarian (cause that time I was quiet and read books the whole day)... Then when I approached sec. school my ambition changed to be a police woman... I was inspired by the show GI Jane... haha... I really wanted to go to the army... Haha.... I dunno why in secondary 4 I suddenly thought of going nursing... I never thought well of it... it was just in sec 4 mid year I still never thought of where to go... I went to all the JC and poly course websites and slowly looked through all of them.... i really wanted a job that is very meaningful and can help ppl... and nursing is my choice... though my family dun really like it at first but i think it was a right decision...

I rememeber in secondary 4 my school brought us to Sun love Home... Is a home for the intellectually disabled... Although it was a bit scary at first I really learnt alot by going there... The home seems dark and isolated in a ulu Yio Chu kang road... but the ppl are pure in heart and soul... Cause some ppl were locked behind grills cause they are highly dangerous and will attack( thats wat someone said). I believe behind every person there is something worth learning from them... I can't really remember the details but I remember singing with one of the old aunties... I sang some really old chinese songs... and she actually cried ... After that she seemed more happy and I changed to those simple kiddy chinese songs with actions... But it actually took quite some time to get her to open up to me... I was kinda of angry with some of my classmates at that time cause they walked around in groups of 10s and scared the aunty that i was talking to cause they kept on staring at her disgustingly... I believe all the ppl are actually normal... just misunderstood... maybe they need some understanding from ppl... but instead they are met with ridicule and cold malicious looks... Haiz... this world is cruel to do this to them... but then again... i can't say much cause I am in this world... I believe as a nurse they will be able to open up to me more cause I actually do more... Although some might reject me at least I tried... I really hope this world could be a more hopeful place... there is already enough darkness... enough hurt in everyones heart... Although my life is not all happy and has its own fair share of problems I believe God sends these problems to prepare me for wat ever job in the future he wants me to do... This is wat I think... Call me naive or immature but life is short and we never know when we will be gone...

So for all those hurt souls out there dun give up... It is alright to be sad... I suppose this is life... Life is not easy... but not hopeless either...

And I have not given up on my dream to go to third world countries... Haha,... I hope one day it will happen... cause that is a very strong factor why i joined nursing too...