Hello... Today I woke up grudingly to go to school to do my BCLS practice... I think I have at least practised for all aspects of the test. It is just I am a bit worried about the compressing part... I compressed until my wrist became a bit swollen. I know sometimes I use my hand power instead of body power to compress. I shall try to correct my mistakes. I am also scared that during the test I will compress on the wrong location. During the test they will cover up the meter for showing whether we are compressing on the correct position and how much strength we use, so I am worried that halfway though the test I will suddenly shift my hand and unknowingly compress on the wrong area... and this will in turn cause me to fail my BCLS practical... I am also a bit worried for 2-man CPR cause I am doing the CPR with someone I dunno and 2-man CPR requires alot of coordination. If the testing is according to our class number, then it is either the person in front or behind me. Unfortunately the ppl in front and behind are 2 new repeat students and I have not really work with them yet...
As for baby choking I am a bit concerned about the "sanwich" position cause it is not very stable to flip the baby on my knee, head facing down... I am scared that will drop the which would be a straight fail. I must tell myself to be more gentle... Haha... But I thot I am already gentle...

P.S. When doing sandwich position must not hit baby head against trolley or table...

I actually prefer these extra clinical lessons than the normal lessons cause less ppl will come therfore we have more chance to practice. Alina said that she feel very inferior to Brenda and Jacqueline... I hope she understands that we dun expect her to be better or anything and dun compare herself to Brenda (although I know she is very clinically competant). Whatever it is we can always practice together. I hope she dun compare herself to other ppl cause is really quite a miserable feeling... I know cause I have to admit I also compare myself with other ppl. One case is recently I have been very envious of one of my class mates called Jiang Yan... Haha... She is really pretty with nice skin, nice figure and beautiful long silky hair, and she learns really fast and is very intelligent (She is like top in alot of subjects as she has really good memory) . Furthermore she in in those chinese cultural dance group so I find her really graceful (I bet she can do splits). Last semester I was the leader but I nominated her as the leader this semester cause I think she will really make a good leader (Haha... not like me). But I have to say I really envy her. i know she is not perfect but when standing next to me I feel I just blend in with the back ground... I mean I dun have nice silky hair... I always have that tom boy sort of hair and I dun find myself intelligent, just hard working at the right time... (b4 exams???), my memory is really short term until I suspect I will get dementia soon and forget everything (touch wood). In the clinical setting I got work with Jiang Yan before... I find her to be so superb in her skills wheras mine are only average... I only good at entertaining patients if you ask me...(dun include feeding, changing pampers but who can't do that). But in spite of all this I sincerely hope she will be a good leader and I will definately help her if she needs it... Sometimes I can tell my friends not to feel inferior to other ppl... but I myself dun practice that... So I must practice wat I preach. I am Jolyn Choo and I am someone special and unique... hehe

I read a comic book called Fruit Basket... In the book it said something that everybodys good points are written on a piece of paper stuck at the back of the person... Supposing Person A himself cannot see his good points but he can always see Person B good points and in turn will envy the person for his good points. But Person B envies Person A character. So I tell myself from now on I shall try not envy other ppl points but according to my timing I shall one day nurture and discover some of my own... I think I have good characteristics... Hopefully...Haha

Ok I am damn tired... I could have gone on and on... Everybody thank God that I did not...